The fidget spinner incident
Life around us continued. I was listening to David's advice, and I even told Larkin that I wouldn't try to stop his relationship with Reagan. I also told him that each and every time he was talking, texting or seeing her, he was destroying our family and tearing us apart. I tried to paint a picture of what life would be like if we were no longer married: shared custody, missing out on birthdays, holidays, major coordination efforts to ensure that each of us knew what was going on with the kid's schedules, two houses, confusion for the kids, and possibly life-long psychological issues for them. I asked him if he had ever considered that if he ended up with Reagan, that I may end up with someone else too. Did he really want our boys to have another "father" in their lives? I tried to be as blunt as possible and I reminded Larkin that I had been willing to forgive in the past, but that I couldn't continue like this. I told him that if he wanted a divorce to PLEASE JUST TELL ME!!! But that it was completely unfair to drag me along, constantly wondering about what he was doing behind my back. And lastly, I told him that he could do a lot of things - be mad at me for whatever, but please STOP THE LIES.
The next scheduled session with David was for Larkin. He went on his own just two weeks after I had been to visit David by myself. The day of the appointment, I was anxious. I longed to know what would be discussed, I hoped and prayed that Larkin would be able to open up to David and that David would lead Larkin away from this other life that he had back toward me and our boys. Larkin came home after his appointment and seemed to be in a good frame of mind. We did our nightly routine with the boys and later had a discussion about how the appointment went. Larkin said he felt good about it, but didn't give too much detail. He said he needed time to digest all that was said, but he told me that he was cutting Reagan off and working to move forward. It felt good to hear that, but I wasn't naïve enough to think that things would be that easy.
By this time, it was mid-September. I was trying to think of a get-away for the two of us, so I suggested that we go to Auburn the weekend of the 23rd and hang out at the camper, watch football, grill some burgers and just spend time together. So that's what we did. We headed out early that Saturday morning after dropping the boys off with Mom and Bruce. It was an awkward weekend though. It was as if I was trying to live some version of normal, when absolutely nothing was normal. During that weekend and the week after, I would ask Larkin about her, or make statements to remind him how it was devastating for me to have to wonder what was going on between them. He was receptive to my statements, but I could tell that if we were going to survive this, it would be a very long and difficult road.
The following weekend we headed back to Auburn - all of us. It was the Auburn v. Miss St. game. We had tailgating plans with Anna and Jeremy, as well as the group that I would refer to as a "walking tailgate party" - Harriet, Melanie, Courtney & Tootie. We all joined up with a big 'ole spread of food and had a really fun time. Some co-workers of mine came by to join us, friends stopped by, it was great. Anna and I had decided to stay at the campsite with the little's while everyone else went to the game. Miller had decided to go with Harriet & crew, with plans to meet up with Larkin at the stadium. So, off they went.
I sent Larkin a text that afternoon, because I had a funny feeling. I checked to make sure that Larkin had made it to the stadium and wanted to see if he had met up with Miller. He responded by letting me know that he had stopped by the Letterman's Club to see some friends. My response: "Please tell me you aren't with her.". He responded with a thumbs up. Really? A thumbs up? My stomach was in knots. He responded with a vague text that he "thought he would be cool. Sorry."
I can't make this stuff up. (insert eye roll emoji)
Later that night, after the game, I checked in on them again. They were headed to the shuttle bus to get back to the campsite. Then I heard back from him. He was letting me know that Miller left his new fidget spinner in the Letterman's Club. Harriet had just bought it for him that afternoon, so they were headed back to find it. Red Flag number 9,576.
I suggested going to buy another one the following day. Larkin insisted on going to look for it because Miller was having a meltdown over it. The next time I heard from Larkin, they had successfully located the fidget spinner and were headed back to the site.
The next thing I knew, the two of them were walking up to the site. Several people had gathered around and were just hanging out. Miller came up to give me a hug and I asked him how the game was. He said that he had a great time. Then he said "Mom, Daddy kissed a girl."
The next scheduled session with David was for Larkin. He went on his own just two weeks after I had been to visit David by myself. The day of the appointment, I was anxious. I longed to know what would be discussed, I hoped and prayed that Larkin would be able to open up to David and that David would lead Larkin away from this other life that he had back toward me and our boys. Larkin came home after his appointment and seemed to be in a good frame of mind. We did our nightly routine with the boys and later had a discussion about how the appointment went. Larkin said he felt good about it, but didn't give too much detail. He said he needed time to digest all that was said, but he told me that he was cutting Reagan off and working to move forward. It felt good to hear that, but I wasn't naïve enough to think that things would be that easy.
By this time, it was mid-September. I was trying to think of a get-away for the two of us, so I suggested that we go to Auburn the weekend of the 23rd and hang out at the camper, watch football, grill some burgers and just spend time together. So that's what we did. We headed out early that Saturday morning after dropping the boys off with Mom and Bruce. It was an awkward weekend though. It was as if I was trying to live some version of normal, when absolutely nothing was normal. During that weekend and the week after, I would ask Larkin about her, or make statements to remind him how it was devastating for me to have to wonder what was going on between them. He was receptive to my statements, but I could tell that if we were going to survive this, it would be a very long and difficult road.
The following weekend we headed back to Auburn - all of us. It was the Auburn v. Miss St. game. We had tailgating plans with Anna and Jeremy, as well as the group that I would refer to as a "walking tailgate party" - Harriet, Melanie, Courtney & Tootie. We all joined up with a big 'ole spread of food and had a really fun time. Some co-workers of mine came by to join us, friends stopped by, it was great. Anna and I had decided to stay at the campsite with the little's while everyone else went to the game. Miller had decided to go with Harriet & crew, with plans to meet up with Larkin at the stadium. So, off they went.
I sent Larkin a text that afternoon, because I had a funny feeling. I checked to make sure that Larkin had made it to the stadium and wanted to see if he had met up with Miller. He responded by letting me know that he had stopped by the Letterman's Club to see some friends. My response: "Please tell me you aren't with her.". He responded with a thumbs up. Really? A thumbs up? My stomach was in knots. He responded with a vague text that he "thought he would be cool. Sorry."
I can't make this stuff up. (insert eye roll emoji)
Later that night, after the game, I checked in on them again. They were headed to the shuttle bus to get back to the campsite. Then I heard back from him. He was letting me know that Miller left his new fidget spinner in the Letterman's Club. Harriet had just bought it for him that afternoon, so they were headed back to find it. Red Flag number 9,576.
I suggested going to buy another one the following day. Larkin insisted on going to look for it because Miller was having a meltdown over it. The next time I heard from Larkin, they had successfully located the fidget spinner and were headed back to the site.
The next thing I knew, the two of them were walking up to the site. Several people had gathered around and were just hanging out. Miller came up to give me a hug and I asked him how the game was. He said that he had a great time. Then he said "Mom, Daddy kissed a girl."
Comments
Post a Comment